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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My STBXWW met hers at the gym, bars and son’s travel team- attractive broken women are everywhere you are, just start talking and mention your parents divorced young due to your dad cheating on your mom.   Tell her he lies all the time and you can’t stand him. If she has a similar story, you found a possible AP.  Good luck ruining your family![/quote]

I mean you know the standard excuse right? Let me remind you and everyone. You didn't pay attention to her needs. It's the same reason they give over and over and over and over. [/quote]

I wish it was true so we could at least become better spouses, instead most of us become worse partners from choosing poorly.   The only person who is never loved unconditionally is a husband and father.  Now that I am broken, I will never marry a second time.  In my case, the heartbreak has changed me fundamentally and I wouldn’t want anyone to be duped into believing I am capable of love again.

The victim mentality is so easy to believe after infidelity- life happens to you, people are out to destroy you, no one can be trusted, you are unlovable and worst of all you are not capable of seeing people for who they are truly.  I can temporarily shake it, but beneath the surface I no longer believe in myself.   I love my kids, but if I had a time machine my wedding day would be the one I would erase without question.

[/quote]

I just recently went through divorce and sending love to you. You will find happiness in other ways. I am happy my ex wife is no longer in the picture. I wish her nothing but the best despite the fact that she was a serial cheater and narcissist. Unfortunately you cannot read into people's thoughts. Sometimes we just choose poorly. Some people genuinely reflect back and admit that they chose poorly. I admit I did. Others would rather not know and turn the other way while their spouse act in a way that's everything but a living spouse. It is what it is. On a positive note, if you have kids they are a source of pride and drive. I love my twin daughters to death. Because of them it's impossible for me to hate my ex wife and/or not support my kids financially and emotionally. Although we have 50/50, in practice I see them 60% of the time. I don't want to think about what will happen when they go to college. I'll be okay, but I will surely miss them.[/quote]

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