Reply to Have any marriages ever gone from dead bedroom to active again?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
[quote=Anonymous]Not enough space for me to give too many details.  
1st year of marriage was good then it became a dead bedroom of maybe twice a year, for the next 20 some years with one stretch of 2 years dry.  It was literally hell for me, but I never fell out of love.  She refused to talk about it, refused to see a therapist after the first visit.  18 yrs ago I left in the middle of the night and told her via phone I just couldn't do it anymore.  She began taking hormones and we've been strong ever since.  She actually initiates and very rarely ever turns me down.  Later 60's now and having fun. She still refuses to take any responsibility or talk about it.  YMMV[/quote]
Many women lose desire for their husbands when the husbands are too nice. Anytime a wife removes sex from the marriage, the right thing to say is you will ending the marriage. Being understanding or giving her time will make it worse. This will bring her desire back, assuming you are not abusive, obese, bad hygiene or a couch potato. [/quote]

My wife does it out of obligation once a month. So not off the table. Nevertheless, this needs to change. 
I don’t want to threaten to leave, but struggling to find the right way to make thar point. [/quote]
We were in a similar situation a few years ago. It wasn't that her drive had diminished - just that she enjoyed her toy way more than she enjoyed me. We started using the toy together and that made a huge difference - she now initiates as often as I do. So whatever floats her boat, incorporate that into your time together...unless that's another guy.[/quote]

I think I’ll give that a try. Had she ever shown an interest in toys before? What was the toy?[/quote]

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