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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have an almost 9 year old who just started 3rd grade. She has good organizational skills at school--doesn't lose things, picks up on classroom routines, etc. Teachers have noted it. And yet, half the things you write she does at home (towels on the floor, laundry not in hamper, not putting shoes away and the dog gets them, not being mindful about crumbs).

You are expecting a lot more from your kid who evidently does not have good organizational skills at school than I do from mine at this point. Pick one thing to work on and have him be responsible for that one thing, and then when he has that down, add one more thing. Your description of what you do before school in the morning is overwhelming and stressful to me, your kid might feel the same. An overwhelmed brain is not going to take on these lessons.

FWIW, my kid responsibilities in the morning before school are to get herself dressed, come downstairs, eat breakfast, hold still while I do her hair, go to the bathroom, get shoes on, and walk to the bus stop. Lunch gets packed the night before and waits in the fridge. Laptop gets plugged into charger after school. If she has homework, or library books, or something to take to school that goes in the backpack the night before--in the morning I fill her water bottle, pull the lunch out of the fridge, and put those and the laptop in the backpack. Wakeup to out the door for my kid is about 45 minutes, sometimes less, but eating enough to not be cranky and being dressed for the weather are the most important things.

Your child forgetting their lunch once or twice a school year is not something to make something of. omg. My kid left their lunchbox at school once or twice last year--we have a spare, so she knew that she had to bring both home the next day or buy cafeteria lunch (she never forgot the second day--she hates buying). This summer she mastered taking a shower and washing her own hair independently (all steps, rinsing completely, etc) and that was a big win.

Do you never forget things? Once or twice a year is not notable, all humans forget things.

Start with one thing. Streamline the process so it is logical to your kid, but start with one thing and do the rest for him. See how that goes, then add one more thing, etc.

You sound like a perfectionist and that he is pushing all your buttons and stressing you out and you are spiraling as a result. I get it, I have this tendency, but seriously--it's the beginning of 3rd grade. There is time to teach him how to be an independent human before he goes to college.[/quote]

I think people think I am making a bigger deal of things and I am not. But I understand that it’s hard to read tone online. It is not stressful and I am not giving DS a hard time about forgetting lunch. I’m giving that as an example. Not am I standing there like a silent lump or in a different room expecting him to pack his own lunch and get a younger sibling ready for school. We usually have a nice breakfast together and chat and I remind him to do things and I fix his hair. It’s… pleasant. People are responding to this thread like I’m screaming and rushing out the door or else ignoring him and then trying to catch him forgetting something so I can say “Haha I told you so!”

I’m doing what I’m doing which mostly works, but I’m saying he is still disorganized and forgetful and teachers are consistently telling me that it is moreso than with most others. I want to know what else I can do and also whether I am doing what I should be doing. [/quote]

His teacher isn't complaining that he forgot his lunch once last year, so what are they complaining about?[/quote]

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