Reply to Concerning? BIL and SIL publicly crying at a gathering the weekend before their only child leaves for college

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Reply to "Concerning? BIL and SIL publicly crying at a gathering the weekend before their only child leaves for college"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm very introverted and this would make me cringe. But to each their own, I guess. My circle has all sent at least one kid to college, and no one cried during a party. They sniff a bit in the car while returning home after dropping off their kid. But if they had a graduation party AND a goodbye party, maybe they're the type to emote in public.[/quote]

Yes, it made me and my husband a little uncomfortable. We totally empathize with them but it was a bit awkward. [/quote]

OP, you need to figure out why parents expressing love for their kid and showing emotion makes you feel “awkward.”

MYOB. You sound like an a**.[/quote]

Sorry, I'm an introvert and I think it's the overtly emotional who are rude and weird. I don't want to see that.[/quote]

Being "overtly emotional" isn't the opposite of being an introvert. Even introverts can display emotion. I think you sre confusing introvert with some other trait....

Look, I was a rock until right before my kid left this weekend.

I have a great 30  year marriage..we were together/married for 18 years before we had a child.

But our kid..wow. we love them so much. And it has been MUCH harder than expected. We figured it would feel like before they came. Boy, were we wrong.

So now...this robot of a human is crying quietly on a plane with strangers around. .

If it had been my family and friends who I feel safe with...yeah...I probably would have cried not so quietly [/quote]

But you haven't yet. And probably never will. Crying quietly a plane is OK. Inviting people over to see you cry is not.[/quote]

I disagree.  Surrounding yourself with community seems healthy at a big transition.   [/quote]
Agree. [b]Crying at a gathering of friends and family is perfectly normal. Especially when it involves your only child. [/b]

OP, you don’t know their inner pain and struggles. Maybe their kid had severe adhd and they doubted he/she would ever graduate, let alone go to college. Maybe their kid was relentlessly bullied and they are now overwhelmed by feelings of joy and relief. Maybe their kid has severe medical issues and they are worried about the kid taking their meds everyday. There are many reasons why parents would be overly emotional about their kid leaving home. [/quote]

No, it's not normal. I've never seen that, and I've been to a graduations and goodbye dinners and lots of events surrounding transitions.

As PP said, this isn't a funeral.

And to your last paragraph, PP, I have a child who really struggled, and who went off to college. His many, many struggles could not be hidden. OP is the aunt. If the kid had serious issues, she'd know about it, especially at a event where the parents felt comfortable retracing the life of their kid and crying in front of everyone. They're not shy about sharing, these folks.

So no, none of this is normal.

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