Reply to 16 year old son doesn't handle dating well

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote] Three times in a row without a lesson learned is behavior. Does he have any diagnosis or anxiety OP?[/quote]

Yes, he has a diagnosis of anxiety and a 504 plan that lets him do any required oral presentations one on one with a teacher due to it.  [/quote]

Talk with him about the anxiety piece.

Help him recognize that relationships of all kinds involve uncertainty - in part because no matter how much people like each other, they’re still two separate people. This means they’re never going to be perfectly aligned on all things at all times, and there’s never any certainty about exactly how things will go.

That unpredictability is a feature, not a bug. It’s part of what we all sign up for when we form relationships with other people. But it can be VERY hard for people with anxiety to live with uncertainty. But seeking constant reassurance or contact etc. from a partner or friend is not the answer. It drives people away.

Encourage DC to take a break from dating for the next three months and focus instead on his platonic friendships. At the same time, have him continue therapy re his anxiety. He needs to be more flexible in the face of uncertainty (“get more comfortable being uncomfortable”) before trying again with a new girlfriend. [/quote]

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