Reply to Tired of the name calling

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Unpopular opinion perhaps, but there is no excuse for name calling and being given the middle finger by your spouse. None. It doesn’t matter what you said first or what you did first. It doesn’t matter if you stood over his bed with a pot lid and wooden spoon to wake him up. It’s still not okay. 
He doesn’t love you. That’s not love.

[b]That’s. NOT. Love.[/b][/quote]

I agree with this. My parents marriage wasn't perfect, but my father never once cursed at my mother, or called her any names. He'd slam doors or cabinets, but that's it. [/quote]

What a funky standard! Slam doors and cabinets, but don't raise a finger or say words...

I mean, is any of it "acceptable behavior"? No. But all of it is human behavior, and all humans get frustrated. It's unrealistic to expect them to never have ways of showing it.

It's not the behavior that is inherently problematic. It's that OP has expressed that she finds it disrespectful and upsetting, and that didn't motivate OP's spouse to shift. Personally, I'd view someone flipping me off as a sign of mild annoyance and immaturity; it wouldn't really phase me at all. Similarly, I don't really care about swears. But if you slam things around me, I'd interpret that as a sign of violent behavior, and that would upset me.

It's about OP's reaction to it, and how OP clearly communicated she didn't like it and spouse can't/won't stop. [/quote]

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