Reply to She’s not allowed to just keep popping in and out of our lives

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP what I had to do was meet my mother where she was. I didn't invite her to things I knew she would turn down. I had no expectations of help and knew I would be need to cater to her some when I saw her. It worked well for a while.

Sadly things changed drastically as she aged and she wanted to see me and my teenage kids and my husband (who she barely expressed interest in) WEEKLY and became quite demanding and angry. She would compare us to her neighbors kids who visit often and I almost wish I didn't take the high road. I didn't want to rub in her face that her neighbor is the most loving grandma who babysat all the time, moved in with them to be a fulltime nanny, night nurse and chef the first month post birth so they could relax more and would take the kids for as much as a month or 2 for anything from work trips to solo parent trips to needing to do renovations without parenting. She filled their freezer with home-cooked meals whenever she could. I didn't expect any of this, I just also didn't expect outrageous expectations from someone who never showed that much interest. [/quote]

This is hard when the kids have no bond and know they aren't a priority.  My mom has never babysat and sees us a few times a year despite being close.  She all of the sudden wants to see the kids but canceled the last few times last minute.[/quote]

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