Reply to Is it OK for a widowed parent to travel without the kids?

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Reply to "Is it OK for a widowed parent to travel without the kids?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes.

I’m not sure why you think being widowed changes your ability to travel “from a moral perspective “.  What’s the “moral” issue here? [/quote]

Recent widow, abandoning her kids for a few days, going away to England for "adults-only" vacation. Not understanding that the girls have also lost their dad and now mom is skipping away.  Sensitivity chip is missing.

No one would have a problem if she took her kids to a beach vacation, or Disney.  But, maybe the kids are used to her not being around.  [/quote]

How have you turned staying with a grandparent that the kids are close to into “abandonment “?  Maybe one or both of them would experience it that way. Maybe one or both of them would be relieved to have some time with their grandmother — and space to grieve in a different way, or be centered in a different way than their bereaved family now allows.

If we’re going to project, I’ll throw in the mix how excruciatingly difficult it was for me as a teen to have the emotional burdens of my own mother’s grief. If she had been able to share her grief with other adults, and, yes, enjoy some adults-only time, that would have given me permission and examples that would have helped me to heal in age appropriate ways as well.  I don’t know the situation of anyone in this family, but I would not assume that the kids are in any way being abandoned.

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