Reply to Can we hash out the who is a single parent nonsense here?

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Reply to "Can we hash out the who is a single parent nonsense here?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t think women in long term partnerships w kids, joint expenses and houses etc- fully mingled lives minus the “official peice of paper” consider themselves “single” mothers. I know a few and have never heard that. [/quote]

My husband's ex did.  She gets child support and alimony, plus live in boyfriend, doesn't work and screams poverty.  They live comfortably but little goes the kids.[/quote]

I want to how the family is "living comfortably" with children, and yet not spending any money on the kids. The kids aren't living in the "comfortable" home? They aren't being fed? They don't ride in the vehicles, or go to the school associated with the "comfortable" neighborhood?

Those things are his responsibility too.

[/quote]

Yes, but the kids work to pay their stuff and bike or get rides.  Mom does not drive them anywhere except a rare occasion.  She refused to get the youngest braces as she had to pay half out of the money she gets from dad and drive to appointments.  It’s not a fancy neighborhood.  And, public is free.  They aren’t allowed activities.  We offered to pay as long as we can pay directly since mom kept the money when we sent it to her many times upon request.  [/quote]

It's possible that your husband's ex is terrible, or that she's being a responsible parent in encouraging the kids to work.  But I can't figure out what this has to do with whether women can call themselves single mothers.  The issue doesn't even seem to be that she is using that term.  If she spent the same way, and complained about poverty the same way and stopped using the term "single mother" would things improve for anyone?

And even if one annoying person uses a term in a way that annoys you, it doesn't follow that you should then police other people's use of the term "single mom" to describe themselves.

Any thread in which a woman uses the term "single mom" to describe herself, even if she's talking about escaping domestic violence, is overtaken by people yelling about how they aren't a single mom.  It's bizarre.  If it's you, then stop![/quote]

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