Reply to Why do women stay after their husbands affair(s)?

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[quote=Anonymous]Two posters on the first page said it best:

Sexual fidelity is not my most important kind of fidelity, and, I don’t want to have a divided family.

When my husband disclosed his infidelity, he came to me and said, “I have to tell you something and I’m terrified”. My mind immediately went to “he’s a drug addict” or “he’s gambled away all of our savings”. Somehow, the physical act of sex was the least devastating aspect of the whole thing.

I’ve spent 20 years building our life, and I’ll be damned if I give up 50% of it because he had sex with someone else once and never again. Of course, the cheating spouse has to also be on board with reconciliation—some aren’t—and has to be willing to do “all the things” and allow full transparency for the rest of their life. My DH has done that and puts in the work. With that said, how stupid would I be to destroy my life over this?

Sell the house I love and have put my blood, sweat and tears into, to get 50% of the value? No.

Give up holidays with my children, and eventually grandchildren? No.

Have a less desirable retirement because I’m cutting my finances in half? Absolutely not.

So I stay, because I choose to stay and retain what I’ve worked my ass off to attain. I’m keeping my LIFE. [/quote]

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