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[quote=Anonymous]I was in this situation playing my second year of JV softball with a first year coach. I finally asked the coach what I could do to get playing time. He said “do better in the games.” Except I was never in games. It was such a mindf—-! I think I was subbed into maybe 1 inning twice that season, and the pressure to show what I could do was overwhelming but I did fine, but not amazing and wasn’t getting home runs or anything.

I switched to a different spring sport the next year. It took until my second professional job when I encountered a boss similar to that coach to realize that nothing I did was ever going to please either or them, and sometimes coaches and bosses just dislike someone for no reason. Contorting yourself to try to win their favor is impossible and soul-crushing. In hindsight, both were cut from a similar mold: semi-failed beta men in the direct shadow of more successful women leaders (varsity coach, big boss) who took their frustrations out by randomly creating out-groups and using the tiny bit of power they had to exercise their dislike of people.

As someone who absolutely loved softball and was devoted to it for 10 years, my advice is to find another sport. I say that with a lot of heartbreak and empathy.[/quote]

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