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[quote=Anonymous]Kind of sounds like she feels guilty for not being there for her kids and is trying to make up for it by constantly reaching for “the best” of everything? If she had enough time to really be doing her research on early childhood, she would see that unscheduled free play is one of the most important things that young children can have. And the tutoring does sound ridiculous, but tbh if she was staying home with them, she’d be introducing colors and letters in the course of the day while reading to them etc. and whatnot at this age is really not meaningful other than to harness their freedom and not let them learn about the world around them and take them away from social-emotional learning w peers, at the playground, etc. At any rate they’re probably doing that in preschool anyway. Perhaps you can convince her to scale down for your kids’ benefit, not because of the money. 
But tbh, I don’t actually think this spending is soooo crazy. Especially if you make in the 600s and live in a less expensive area than DC.
You guys just have very different values and need to sort that out. Personally I’m in the “you get what you pay for” camp w things like daycare and prefer to send my children to places that are desirable places to work bc their employees are fairly compensated. We make in the 400s in the DC area and have done out-of-pocket speech therapy, swimming, music, pre-gymnastics, soccer, and preschool, but never more than three at one time. Everyone in our playgroup, of various incomes, [/quote]

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