Reply to 5PM Wedding-MIL wants to wear a hat

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, if you don't want her to wear a hat because it will ruin the photos tell her that. Say you're worried that the hat will throw off the photos. Or wear the hat and take off for the official photos. (Though this is hard to do.)

Or does it feel that MIL wants to be the center of attention with her British-style hat?

More info, OP. Otherwise, 5pm is not an inappropriate time for a hat.[/quote]
Some of you are really dredging up old etiquette. It's not about "Oh, well, Emily Post said this in 1975." Part of etiquette is about fitting in, and no one in America wears hats to evening weddings![/quote]

All you have to do is Google and you'll see that it is still currently okay to wear a hat up at 5pm. [/quote]
It is okay. But when do you see it at 5pm? I was just at a wedding that started at 4 a few weeks ago. No hats. [/quote]

I hear you. But I would venture to say that in the US not many people are wearing hats to weddings at all anymore. So seeing no hats at 4 pm or whenever really isn't at issue.

It boils down to why doesn't OP want MIL to wear a hat. She thinks it's inappropriate? Technically, it's not. Attention-grabber at OP's wedding? Then in this case, not appropriate. [/quote]
I hear you, too, but Idk I just don't agree! In the US not many people wear hats to weddings anymore so wearing one is inherently attention-seeking!

The hat itself is okay etiquette-wise but attention seeking is always a no-no! [/quote]

Basically, we are saying the same thing. The difference is that I am giving a tiny bit of grace to the MIL if she thinks this is appropriate attire and has waited her whole life to wear a hat to a wedding. But, if it is as you are saying that no matter the etiquette, MIL wearing a hat for any reason is attention-seeking, then agreed, if OP doesn't want her to wear the hat she shouldn't.

However, I really don't think this is a hill to die on. Separately, this is reminding me in concept of the post by the guy who wants to secretly set aside the 1M for his parents and not tell his fiancee about it. Just bad ways to go into marriages. [/quote]

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