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Eldercare
Reply to "Guilt tripping the “good” daughter"
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[quote=Anonymous]15:58 posting again... The issue is with your mom even more than with your siblings. I did far more for dad than my siblings, but he was appreciative and I enjoyed his company. It was not that emotionally draining, except when he had an emergency. I don't resent my siblings at all when it comes to dad (but boy did I when it came to mom). With dad, I think because I spent so much time with him, I was more at peace when he passed away. I knew he was ready and it was a relief he was no longer suffering. With mom the resentment was overwhelming and she brought out the worst in us all. So many interactions with her left me emotionally exhausted-just a visit and the recovery took a long time. Manipulations/guilt trips/digs/gaslighting wear you down. She also sparked some toxic sibling dynamics. It was impacting my physical and mental health. The best thing I did was step back. It was healing. I could see more clearly how toxic the situation was and I do believe she can receive much better care from people paid to deal with her difficult behavior. It was important for my siblings to see just how much what I was doing for free is worth. They also see how many drivers/aides she goes through because of bad behavior and now she occasionally throws some toxic their way.[/quote]
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