Reply to Resentment/regret re difficult son

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You are a bad parent. I am the daughter in a family where the son is like yours, and he ruined our lives by holding the entire family hostage with his nonsense for decades. And like you, my parents enabled him (and ignored me and my needs completely) because they were always putting out fires for dysfunctional brother. He’s holding the threat of suicide over your heads to hold you hostage so you’ll continue enabling.

Guess what? My brother dropped out of (T20, full pay for my parents) college anyway, still did drugs, has never held a steady job, and at 40 still lives at home with some chronic health problems, and is just generally a mean, ungrateful, unpleasant person. All that snowplowing my parents did for him his whole life did NOTHING. Your enabling is not ever going to help this kid.

Drop the rope. Focus on your daughter, your spouse, yourself. Stop letting the threat of suicide make you enable this kid forever.[/quote]

And you're a shitty human being who doesn't understand that your experience is YOUR experience alone. Every child deserves to not be dropped at the age of 21 - WITH A BRAIN INJURY AND MENTAL ILLNESS. If you would like another experience that totally flips yours on its head.....I was a horrid teen (depressed, couldn't handle what was happening in my life, constant partying and drugs, rehab by 17, sleeping around, etc). I wasn't diagnosed with anything for years, part refusal on my part, part lack of understanding at the time (early 90s). I didn't go to college right away, continued to party. My parents never gave up. Thank God they never gave up. Thank God I had the chance to live my life and wasn't written off at the age of 18/19/20/21. I am now a c-suite exec at a global firm, have 2 children, and i've been married for more than 20 years. Those very close to me are legitimately shocked when I tell them about my teen/young adult years.

OP - I hope all is well and that you continue to see some improvements!! I'm rooting for you and your ds![/quote]

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