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[quote=Anonymous]"He's cheated in the past, I've forgiven him and we are moving forward. But, I've had no interest in having sex with him because of his past."

Op, you've got it all wrong. You haven't forgiven him if you won't have sex with him, and you've certainly not moved forward. And it doesn't sound like he was remorseful and committed to not having another affair given that you've found that weird bracelet in his possession.

You can't have a repaired marriage that doesn't include sex. He obviously still enjoys sex. How in the world could you expect him to spend the rest of his life not having sex again? That's not marriage, it's prison. You want to keep your dual incomes and your social standing as an intact married couple. But you can't have that if you're not behaving like married people, and married people have sex with one another. They ONLY have sex with one another.

You are trying to find some strange configuration in which you don't lose the things you've grown accustomed to as a wife without doing normal married person/wife things like having sex. And you're willing to let him behave like a single guy who has sex with whomever he wants to, so long as it's not his wife! Do you see how weird this is?

Face the music. Your marriage is over, as are the things that come with a UMC marriage. You're going to have to downgrade and downsize your lifestyle. Your friends won't look at you the same way anymore. Your kids won't be able to go to private colleges or keep up their expensive hobbies. But you'll all survive and be fine. I'm divorced and I earn about $150K. My ex earns about $250K. Is my current life or my future retirement as comfy as they once were? No. But I'm fine. And you will be fine too. [/quote]

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