Reply to Awkward – neighbors overheard me talk about their DC

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As the Mom of a preemie born at less than 2 lbs. and who spent months in the NICU, I do understand OP. I recall all too well how you worry for your baby in ways that other parents can not even imagine.  Comments offered innocently (as your neighbors were) can take on volumes of painful meanings.

But here is the thing ... it is all how you look at it.  You have a choice.  People constantly commented on how tiny my guy was and each time it made me smile.  I proudly answered their comments with the truth, "Yes, he is tiny and he is a fighter"!  OP, let your pride for your child come through loud and clear.  Don't dwell on the negatives (for you must be to have your neighbors comments bother you so much).  Our babies are survivors.  I am still so flipp'n proud of my kid and all he has overcome.[/quote]

PP, I admire your positive outlook and I think you gave great advice.  I had an experience more like the OP did, though, and I'm going to share it here so she knows she's not the only one who has a hard time with this.

When I brought my daughter home after 2 agonizing months of hospital bedrest and terrifying ups and downs, she was about 5 pounds.   On the very rare occasions we ventured out, I heard "tiny" over and over again, and it stung --I felt much like how the OP has described.  And I also heard people say things that were more pointed and hurtful (to me) and to be honest, OP, it sounds like I handled it way worse than you did.  A waitress in a restaurant took a look at my daughter and said, "Oooh, that baby is a preemie, what happened to you?"  A woman at the pediatrician whispered to her friend, "I've never seen a baby that small."  And every time it sent me over the edge.   I didn't make any foot in mouth comments, but I fled the scene and bawled for a good while and I know I really overreacted.  But you know what?  Sometimes things hurt, and you can't change that fact.  My kid is two now, and I am still not okay with what we went through and where it left me emotionally.

To all the people who are telling her to get over it, well, if only it were that easy.[/quote]

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