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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What is your vision of married life together?  Will you have kids?  Who will care for them? Who will be there when they are sick? Who will clean the house? Who will cook the daily meals?  If it is too hard to do all the things, how will you adjust.  Whose job will take precedence?

You don't have to answer any of these questions for DCUM.  But you should talk about it with your BF.[/quote]

My ideal vision is to have 2-4 kids ( most likely just 2) and work PT. Be present in raising my kids but hopefully afford to outsource cleaning and other household responsibilities except for cooking.

I want a husband who works hard but also has the time to be present in his children’s lives. [/quote]

Sounds like he's not that guy.

This sounds super boring and lonely to me, but whatever.

You can't outsource everything. And it's work to manage outsourcing. If you want a nanny or household manager to be your partner in life, go for it.[/quote]

I love him though. I can’t really imagine breaking up with him or not spending my life with him. I just have all these older women advising me what not to do because they are stuck in situations with high performing partners who work ridiculous amount of hours and rarely see their family. [/quote]

Ok, and? Some people would be ok with that. I personally would not, but that doesn't make it right or wrong, just right or wrong for someone.

If you want a husband who is very involved in your family life and you want to have 4 kids (!) then this guy probably isn't the one. If you want someone to bankroll your life and you are entirely in charge of your kids, then this sounds like it would be a good setup for you. Again, neither one is right or wrong, it's just what you want. And what he is willing to give - so what does he say about all of this?[/quote]

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