Reply to What constitutes a large family, in your opinion?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]At this point I consider 3+ kids large. When I was young it was 4+. But I think as parenting standards have risen to expect more involved, intensive parenting, 3 kids now taxes the ability of parents to meet those standards in a way it didn't back in the 80s and 90s.

I know so many 1 or 2 kid families now. It's the vast majority of families I know (2 is most common but I know a LOT of onlies, likely because I am in a field where many women marry and start families later). This also makes the 3 kid families seem so much bigger than they used to. The third child adds an element of noise and (for lack of a better word) chaos that does not exist with most of the families I know.[/quote]

Sort of the opposite! I didn't know a single family that had more than 2 kids when I was growing up (I was born in the 80s). I have tons of cousins and they all only had one sibling each.

Now 3 seems to be standard for those who can afford it. Everyone seems to have either no kids or 3 kids. [/quote]

The new most obnoxious comment on DCUM is people who view having 3 or more kids as a signifier of wealth and class. What a stupid reason to have more kids.

I can afford to have a goat and yet I don't because who wants a goat? I certainly don't walk around explaining to people that it makes sense for me to have a goat because, after all, I can afford it.[/quote]

Ha so true. I also find this obnoxious.[/quote]

You both are missing the point.People aren't having 3 kids to showcase wealth, but people that can afford to raise three kids generally have more money than those that don't.[/quote]

This assumes people will have only as many children as they can afford and no more or less.

Lots of wealthy people do not want three kids and don't have them. Lots of not wealthy people have 3 or more kids even though it strains finances. Claiming people are having a third kid because "they can afford it" is a weird way of framing the decision to have a child.[/quote]

It also highlights the degree to which having kids in the US is a capitalist choice because we do so little to support or help families. We make it very expensive to have children and provide a decent future for them. In a country with universal healthcare, free college and vocational training programs, and more of a social safety net regarding housing, unemployment, and old age, people could choose to have the number of kids they thought they could be good parents to. In the US, you could be amazing parents but simply not be able to afford additional kids because of the cost of healthcare, education, and your own elder care.[/quote]

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