Reply to It's been 12 years since FIL passed away

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]And please don't be rude or petty. You don't know what he was dealing with back then or even now, OP. It's better to be kind. [/quote]

He's still bemoaning what he went through 20+ years ago.  It was awful, nobody died, and it's been 20+ years.  He doesn't really move past anything.

I'm just annoyed.

[/quote]

You said 12 years ago and now it's 20? Ok.[/quote]
 
You're confused.

-  FIL passed away 12 years ago.

-   My brother had his own issues 20+ years ago.  He still hasn't dealt with those issues.

[/quote]

So why invite him for Christmas? It sounds like you'll all be happier if you just do your own thing.[/quote]

This. I don’t understand why you’re putting yourself to one iota of work for this manchild?[/quote]

Op here.  Our mom was hoping he would come if I asked.

He never did say anything.  He can wallow.  Our parents can make their own arrangements to see him.  I'm done.

[/quote]

Confused by OP's follow-up. So he did visit for Christmas or he didn't? And what do you mean he never said anything. About what? [/quote]

Op here.  He never responded to the invite for Christmas at all.   I haven't talked to him since.

No, he did not visit.  [/quote]

Did you have a nice holiday? [/quote]

Yes! :)

I'm not even overly surprised that he didn't respond.  I need to remember not to reach out, including telling our Mom "no" if necessary.  She's likely to forget this. I won't.[/quote]

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