Reply to My (potential) date wants a ride

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "My (potential) date wants a ride "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]To me, Not having a car is not a red flag. FYI Many successful grown men from Boston or NYC do not have cars or are comfortable driving. however Not being resourceful enough to get to the date probably would be a red flag to me. 
[/b]
 If he’s new to the country he may not drive or it may take a while to get up to speed on our driving/DMV laws. He may currently be in the process of getting a car/license/insurance.

OP, If you really like this guy, I would not run. I’d take the time to get to know the why.[/quote]

New poster and came to say what PP says above in bold. Not owning a car, per se, is not a red flag. Not driving, in itself, is not the terrible sin many of us Americans tend to think it is. There are MANY reasons someone might not own a car, or even drive at all, even if they live in what [i]you [/i]consider a not-walkable area.

But as PP notes: Not being resourceful enough to get to another location for a date on one's own steam is the part that would bother me. And for a first date with someone I'd only "met" virtually? The common wisdom is always to meet each other at a public place--restaurant, coffee shop, movie theater, park, whatever. Not to go to either person's home, and that includes pickups.

And OP, if your gut says you don't want a stranger in your car like this, listen to your gut. Like the PP above, if all else seemed fine, I might chalk up the ride request to his being from another country where perhaps this request would be no big deal, and I might not write him off JUST on this one thing - but I also would [b]not[/b] pick him up for this first date! I'd tell him I can't give him a lift in either direction but would be fine with meeting him at [location whatever]. Then see if he wants the date enough to take initiative and find his way there--and his way back home. But that's about sticking to the basic safety protocols for meeting a stranger; it's not about judging the lack of a car as a problem in itself. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics