Reply to 50/50 not the norm nationwide

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]50/50 is terrible for kids [/quote]

It's actually healthy for kids to spend time with both parents regularly. It's also presumed in many if not most states. OP didn't say what state they're in, and I feel like some of the story there may be missing.[/quote]

OP describes a near 50-50 arrangement but one that keeps the kids in one home during the school week.

I do not feel the OP is providing all the info on the decision between schools. It's easy to say "oh the schools in the other district aren't as good." What does that really mean though? That's a deeply subjective metric and a judge isn't going to sit there and compare test scores and AP program availability at the feeder HS -- that isn't the judge's job thankfully. Rather it's going to turn on things like proximity of the homes to the schools and what the commute looks like and how stable the situation is.

If the ex came in and said "look we are moving to a home close to the elementary and middle school where the kids can walk AND their cousins are already at these schools AND my mom lives up the street and will be able to help with after school care plus is home during the day in case anything comes up and can provide childcare on days when school is closed or canceled" that is all really compelling. If OP situation is "well the kids already attend this school but it's a car commute daily and I will be at work 45 minutes from the school every day and I have no childcare arrangements set up to help" that is a lot less compelling.

Note that OP's plan to keep the kids in the school where they are hinged on his ex staying and renting in that school district. This raises a question as to whether he expects the ex to be providing the backup childcare needed. If that's the case that's going to sway the judge to letting the parent who is going to have primary weekday childcare responsibility decide where the kids go to school within reason.

And agree with the PP who mentioned that with kids this age the judge may have interviewed them and taken their preferences into account.

I also think it's odd that OP is worried the kids won't have a good relationship with him or wondering if his son can choose to come live with OP when he's older -- it sounds like the kids WILL be living with him a lot. At least 2 days a week on the weekend (and potentially including Friday night and Monday morning plus half the summer and most holidays. That's a lot of time together. If the issue is wanting plenty of time with his kids it sounds like he got it -- there is nothing about that arrangement that makes me think he's likely to be estranged or replaced by the ex meeting someone else.[/quote]

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