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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
OP,

Autism screams out at me from your description of this neighbor's child. There must be some twice exceptionality there (meaning high IQ with some sort of learning disability or special need).

I say this because I have a gifted, learning disabled kid. He has ADHD and ASD, plus some learning disabilities. Also he has a high IQ. He has never fit in: when he was redshirted, on the advice of his pediatrician, he was academically bored but socially it was only a tiny bit better. We skipped him ahead again, because I realized that socially he would never completely fit in, so it was better to keep him challenged academically.

My point is this: please don't be too offended by this parent. Maybe internally she's deeply worried about her child, and she's trying to figure it out. Whatever her parent is doing or not doing, consider that this child, unlike yours, will always have a harder time because she has a neurodivergence that will not go away. My son is in college now, and just as intellectual and socially awkward as before. He won't be able to network or befriend people like normal people do. It will impact his professional and private life.

Your kid is lucky - she is bright and socially attuned. Keep in mind that she has much higher chances of success in life than my kid or your neighbor's kid.

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I posted the above. Maybe I didn't make this clear, OP, but if her child is neurodivergent (and from the context, she might very well be), then it's clear the mother hasn't realized it yet. Hence why she's going on about it. Otherwise she would just say, given that she's comfortable sharing with you: "Larla is gifted and on the spectrum, there's a enormous discrepancy between her academic and social skills, it's really hard to know how to parent her. On the one hand she needs academic challenge - I need to enrich at home. On the other, she needs social skills coaching." Or some version of that. This is exactly how my son is, so BTDT myself.

But we can sit here forever and speculate. The reality is that you might never know what's really going on, so if you're annoyed by this woman, try to avoid her politely. And if she corners you, muster up enough compassion to get through the inevitable complaints ;-)
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