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[quote=Anonymous]There’s also a financial reality. My marriage went through a very shaky period in our mid 30s when we had young kids. If there had been abuse or something or major dysfunction I could have left but financially it would have been hard.

We ended up doing counseling and changing some bad dynamics and habits and things got much better over time, but now in late 40s it is much easier to leave if I needed or wanted to. In terms of living separately it would be a relief not have to figure out school districts, etc. And probably less pressure to live as close to each other if you’re not trying to see the kids every day.

Just financially and logistically it might be easier that stage of life.

Also if the daughter is a sophomore they might have wanted to see if transitioning to the empty nest phase helped or changed dynamics and actually been still deciding what they wanted to do with the marriage. It’s possible they weren’t white knuckling until she graduated and it certainly sounds like if they waited over a year they wanted to give it a chance.

And for those couples that wait a few years to split, like after they’ve had an empty nest for a few years, they might only realize they want different things in retirement and they they’ve drifted apart and it might take the empty nest phase to realize that.

It’s very black-and-white thinking to assume that every late in life divorce means that the whole marriage was unhappy.

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