Reply to Elders sometimes become abusive toward those they were closest to, so please don't insert yourself

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]One doesn't have to be a narc to be a crappy parent. Let's face it: mental health was never talked about just a few decades ago and whatever happened in the family, stayed in the family. Maybe 30 years from now things will be different, but what is happening now is certainly healthier than what people had to put up with. If we can do better, why not try? In reality, the only people who love dysfunction in the families are the ones who drive that dysfunction. I'm happy I realized (quite early on) I want to live differently, be a different parent, and I'm not sorry for it. I'm sure my kids will have something to complain about, but I can tell you, they will not be complaining about the things I had to deal with. As far as reading is concerned, why not? It's living in a fantasy world. There are other ways to dissociate, playing video games for example. I would not doubt there may be some truth to it. [/quote]
I know better and do better than my parents. This forum has become a circlejerk for people who diagnose and judge elders with no mercy and based on TikTok psychology. It’s sick. I know generational trauma and violence, and there are times when “NC” is warranted. But it’s become a default for people who didn’t get what they think was perfect parenting. And the ones who screech the loudest and hurt their vulnerable parent will be the ones screeching for inheritance as well. If you’re so healthy with these NC relationships, why are you all constantly bemoaning it in here. Go be happy.

You need a separate forum so those of us who actually want to care for elders can have normal conversations that don’t immediately get derailed into this cult like behavior[/quote]

There are numerous other forums where people think like you. Why aren't you on those sites GrandmaBigPants? It's because you live to scold and tell people they are wrong. I can very well imagine what you are like irl.[/quote]
IRL I am the one people seek out for help, not the spiteful, vengeful one who can never see beyond my own trauma. Why am I here? We used to have good discussions. I’m hoping it comes back. “Where people think like me.” How is that exactly? That NC should not be taken lightly? That’s so unreasonable? I’ll bet I could recognize you irl too. You’re the line cutter, the one who believes everything good in your life is because you earned it but everything bad is someone else’s fault. You’re the Nextdoor poster who can’t tell a drunk, lost, college kid from a burglar. [/quote]

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