Reply to I'm in the Top 10% but it sure as hell doesn't feel like it

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]HHI (gross) is $160K.  Bills include mortgage, credit cards (run up thanks to repairs to our old piece of shit house we shouldn't have bought in the first damned place), aftercare at school for one child, car payment, student loans, insurance, cable, utilities, phone, food, gas, personal debt owed to parents (again b/c of said piece of shit old house).  We contribute to our 401K's so we don't have to rely on the kid or the government in the future but we have no savings.  We bought a house that would sell for 1/3 of what we paid for it in our hometown.  We have no family here.  We don't work in the government, which makes it more ludicrous that we are here in the first damned place.  Kid now has issues that are requiring us to work with specialists that don't accept insurance and take a shit ton of time off work to shuttle kid back and forth between all of the above.  We pulled kid from daycare and put him in free charter for PS b/c we want to give kid a sibling but can't afford a mortgage and two daycare payments.  Now one of said specialists is saying there are too many kids in his classroom causing too much stimulation and contributing to problems.  WTF is our choice?  Put kid back in daycare and put off having kid #2 for two more years?  (We are in our mid to late 30's, so the clock is ticking).  Get a nanny we can't afford?  Live on one income (can't afford)?  Move (thereby delaying kid #2 anyway while my eggs and DH's sperm become even more fucking geriatric)?

Seriously, what the fuck are we doing wrong?  How is it possible to be in the top 10% of all households in the US and still feel as though you are barely keeping your head above water and every day is one big stressor after another?  I just give up.  Seriously.  I want to crawl into my bed and cry every day.  I won't, because my kid deserves better, but holy fucking hell.  [/quote]

Obviously, your biggest problem  is debt sucking up your disposable Income. You won't feel normal or well off until that is  taken care of. I can't advise on the seond child thig; I'm of biased as a I am firmly in the "one and done" camp.

But what I can tell you is to look at things this  way. Debt payments aside, you can afford to pay for the specialist's care, a house, a car, and luxuries like cable and aftercare. And probably some other  daily luxuries or occasional treats that you dont mention. For many, many people, those things are out of reach. You are living pretty well, and would be ale to do better without the debt, as you know.

Once the debt is off your back, you will see how good you really have things. Cut what you have to to get it paid off. And imagine  making half of what you do and how that would suck. That should get you out of bed in the morning.[/quote]

Not OP but THANK YOU. [/quote]

I am OP and thank you, I know.  I just took a walk, grabbed some lunch, called my sister and I feel better.  I know I am a bourgeois asshole and that life could be much worse.

Also decided to tell these "specialists" for the kid to eat shit.  The more that I think about it, there is nothing wrong with my kid that not being 3.5 anymore won't fix.[/quote]

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