Reply to Boyfriend doesn’t provide emotional support

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[quote=Anonymous]You have reasonable expectations of emotional  support.

He has reasonable expectations of someone not being a negative emotionally needy person.

Both are reasonable. Sounds like you guys aren’t a good match longterm.

FWIW I have probably asked dh for a hug on a bad day like three times ever in 25 years. I’m just really low drama on the emotional side. He’s very high eq, but he also is sensitive and I bet if I was doing that once or twice a month, he would find it emotionally draining.

Also, I think the fact that your bf is having twice a week “bad days” that require back rubs or whatever is potentially a red flag. Either his job is objectively terrible, in which case he needs to find a new one. Or he just has very low bandwidth to deal with anything not awesome. The former I could deal with if I saw him on a path to fixing the problem. And also a very good excuse for why he also doesn’t want to have to be heavily emotionally available for you on a frequent basis. The latter would suck to be married to. [/quote]

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