Reply to Concerns about sister's behavior as a step-mother

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would send the child's mother an anonymous letter describing what you've seen. Minding your own business in this situation would be morally bankrupt. Can't believe people are advising that.[/quote]

Totally disagree. You don't know the whole story. Sending the mom a letter will ignite a fire you don't want to set off. Someone suggested calling the girls therapist. [b]The therapist is a mandatory reporter for info that comes directly from the child about abuse. For all the therapist knows you are just someone trying to start drama.[/b] Most therapists would hear the allegations and tell you to report it yourself since you witnessed it. They can call CPS and report 2nd hand info, but there's not a lot you can do with info from someone who did not hear it from the victim or witness it.

I posted before about giving your sister the benefit of the doubt and just saying something like "It seems like she stresses you out a lot." See what your sister says about it. Maybe she will confess step daughter brings out the worst in her and why. Regardless, strongly suggest family therapy with a family therapist who is an expert with regard to stepfamily dynamics. My husband's stepmom was verbally abusive and it was horrible. At the same time, they did provoke her and do passive aggressive things to set her off. She was hated from the 2nd they met her and there was no affair. She met the dad when he was separated. They really needed a skilled family therapist to help develop a better dynamic. [b]This is more complicated than you think[/b].[/quote]

I'm one that suggested calling the therapist.
IMO, even if the therapist cannot or does not report what OP said to CPS, it at least gives the therapist additional info that can be dealt with during their sessions. Even if OP is taken as someone just starting drama, it will open up some questions and possibly alert the therapist to other issues. If there is more to the story, the additional info on how this family presents itself to others needs to be addressed as well. It can't hurt and has potential to help.

I totally agree with you that contacting mom directly is a bad idea at this point. [/quote]

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