Reply to 13yo sleepover without meeting the parents?

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "13yo sleepover without meeting the parents?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's a no from me,

I understand everything will probably be fine OP- but go ahead and call the mom. Speak to her. I hate talking on the phone myself, but you have to got to elevate this beyond text.[/quote]

How do you casually work this series of questions into the conversation
Do you own a gun?
Is your husband on the sex offenders list?
Any creepy uncles or other house guests?[/quote]

"Thank you so much, this is so nice of you. I hope it's ok, just for my peace of mind- who will be home? where will the girls be sleeping? do you have any pets? Just wanted to check with you also- alcohol, weapons?" If you get a vibe you can throw in a comment like "Sorry don't mean to be over the top, but I've heard of some incidents" or whatever.

Also speak to your DD and tell her how to be smart and aware and safe.

And you don't have to be casual. These are fair questions. You don't have to be rude, it's just a conversation.[/quote]

I've never understood the point of asking these questions.  The parents you need to worry about wouldn't ever admit to having alcohol out for the kids to sneak or guns that weren't properly stored.  They're not hooked up to a lie detector.  It makes you feel better to ask, but doesn't change the underlying safety risk at all.[/quote]

It’s not full proof and of course people can lie, but it at least gives you some sort of baseline. There’s likely a different vibe from a parent lying (and probably defensive/giving a basic “no” as an answer) vs a parent who comes off as really forthcoming. E.g. someone who says “We do have a firearm in the home because my spouse is a LEO and we make sure to lock it up in a biometric safe” or an empathic “no, we are not a gun household” who seems open to questions is going to give me a better feeling than someone who is vague, seems put off by my questions, etc. It’s not perfect, but it’s helpful to know if this is a parent whose style you click with.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics