Reply to Husband doesn’t let me express any negative emotions

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My father died and I cannot even truly cry anymore. He gets angry at me when I’m sad or when I cry and God forbid I ever call him out on hurting me express to him to do something differently.

Everything is met with at least denial and more frequently emotional hostility.

Yesterday we were at Mosaic and sitting and people watching. After battling infertility for 3 years, I’m triggered by watching all the mothers with their children. I felt bitter and angry and sad. I said it annoys me how smug everyone looks having reproduced and how it’s triggering me that it’s possible for everyone one to have a baby so easily.

Instead of comforting me, he was like stop it. You’re being a sourpuss. And how I can’t just keep playing victim and I need to move on and be happy.

He couldn’t even try to show me some empathy!

Then he stone walled me for 1 hour and I didn’t speak to him either, not wanting to be the one to talk first. He says he will take me home since I’m in such a bad mood and walked off.

I followed him to the car.

I came home and cried myself to sleep.

This morning he was mad at me again because I was sad. He said he doesn’t care that I’m sad since I’m ruining everyone’s vibes and it will be better for me to not go to MILs Mother’s Day dinner.

This was after I had just gotten out of the shower intending to get ready to go, then he says ok I’m leaving in 10 mins if you’re not dressed then I’m leaving. I tell him to calm down and stop talking to me like that. He says I’m screaming at him and he will not tolerate it and he is ordering me to stop.

Finally he left without me.

I’ve been crying my eyes out in the dark of my bedroom.

[/quote]

This is abuse and not okay.  Can you see this? [/quote]

Jesus lord it’s not abuse. How long does DH have to put up with OP’s negativity?  He’s calling it out and not taking it. That’s not abuse. [/quote]

He gets angry at me when I’m sad or when I cry
Everything is met with at least denial and more frequently emotional hostility
Then he stone walled me for 1 hour 
This morning he was mad at me again because I was sad
He said he doesn’t care that I’m sad since I’m ruining everyone’s vibes and it will be better for me to not go to MILs Mother’s Day dinner
This was after I had just gotten out of the shower intending to get ready to go, then he says ok I’m leaving in 10 mins if you’re not dressed then I’m leaving
Finally he left without me

That's all from the OP. That is not acceptable behavior. There are plenty of ways to handle someone who is being negative, but these aren't those. 
[/quote]
She also stone walled him. He was the one that "caved" first.

He told her he was leaving, and she apparently ended up just staying home? She could have still gone. She chose to cry instead of get ready and try to be happy for their event.

OP is using her tears and emotions as manipulation. She does the exact same thing to him, and it's ok when she does it, but when he does it he's being abusive. [/quote]

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