Reply to So torn about TJ advice to child

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I guess I'm most afraid that by him accepting he's giving up high school and being a kid in place of four years of additional college. TJ seems very collegiate to me. On one hand that's nice and preparatory. On another, it feels like skipping part of childhood.[/quote]

NP. I would love to dig into this a little deeper if that's okay. In what sense are you worried about him "giving up high school"? I'm genuinely curious, as my TJ experience was outstanding once I was able to find my people.

It's also worth noting that accepting the offer of admission to TJ is not a four-year commitment. If it's not the right fit, he can absolutely leave and transition pretty seamlessly into his base school while being ahead of the game from an academic sense.[/quote]

Less time for quintessential American high school traditions and more time spent on studying and academic pursuits. The low wage job learning the value of the dollar, working and hanging out at home after school with family and friends, sports, dating, service, and just doing kid stuff and messing up and learning from mistakes without as much pressure. It weird to be debating whether or not your child should attend a magnet school or work at the local hamburger joint, but if all feels rushed coming from a non-magnet school experience myself. I know many families have had this debate before for decades and there is no wrong answer. They can both work out positively.[/quote]

Honestly, I did all of these things while I was at TJ:

- I worked summer camps over the summer;
- I hung out with friends doing extracurricular activities that I enjoyed after school;
- I played a varsity sport for two years, and sub-varsity the other two years;
- I volunteered through 8th period at a school right near TJ for kids with developmental disabilities;
- and I made a TON of mistakes.

...and I still graduated from my dream school four years after I left TJ.

The pressure cooker atmosphere and comparison culture is much less significant now than it used to be. The biggest thing I would repeat is that you don't want to play the "what if" game years down the road, wondering if your kid passed up on a golden opportunity. At least if he tries it and it doesn't work out, you'll know.[/quote]

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