Reply to Can we just drop the term “gunner“

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree with OP.  It's clearly a pejorative term.  Just because kids use terms like "gunner" and "try-hard" to put down other kids who are obviously ambitious doesn't mean the adults have to follow suit.[/quote]
These things aren't interchangeable though.

Simple ambition and hard work are totally fine.  It's backstabbing, cutthroat, zero-sum type behavior that elevates one to "gunner" status.[/quote]

It would be better just to avoid the term.  DCUM is full of people who jump to ascribe the latter behavior to other people's kids, especially when their ambition and hard work has been recognized and their kids have been denied admission to some school.  [/quote]

But aren't you now being just as unfair in asserting that other kids are just inferior and verbalizing their sour grapes? Isn't a more generous interpretation that other kids don't feel comfortable around the all-work-and-no-play vibe? It's hard to ask for people to curb insults while you're lobbing one of your own. There are hyper-motivated kids that often carry with them a toxicity that is off-putting to some, and asking whether a kid who doesn't fit that mold will fit in is a reasonable question. The DS of a friend was a non-gunner who went to a gunner-type school, and it wasn't a good fit. Vocabulary is useful. Are we not to talk about such things? And, if so, will you also not talk about these inferior jealous kids in a negative (icky, gross, etc.) way?[/quote]

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