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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Does anyone have parents who don't really love/approve of their spouse, even though they're generally pretty great? My parents have never been particularly enamored by DH, which I think is absurd because he's a good person, he's nice, he has a great job, he's a great dad, he contributes to the household (not 50/50 but how often is that the case?). But in their mind, there are all these things: he's had some family dysfunction (and therefore must be all messed up...), he doesn't cook enough (it's true that I cook more, but he does sometimes!), he's not charismatic enough (I admit that he is a bit shy/subdued around them, but I mean, they're his in-laws and I think he's always been a bit intimidated because of that), he's still a kid at heart and hasn't matured yet, he needs to shoulder more household tasks and make my life easier, etc. etc.

In my mind, I have a great marriage and we're happy together. Sure, he's not perfect but who is? I suppose the point of all my rambling is just to ask, is this normal/common? I guess I'm trying to think about things from my parents' perspective. I just feel like there are a million ways that he could be "worse", so how is he still not good enough?! [/quote]

My MIL does not like me.  We have been married more than 10 years and years ago after being married maybe 3 years she took my husband to some fancy event with high powered people and tried to set him up with a friend’s daughter!  She was very open about it  afterwards.  Since then my husband won’t go anywhere alone with just her (I never asked this but he felt really uncomfortable).  I found it totally hysterical, but she kept going on and on about how this woman was so much younger and prettier than me (I am younger than my husband) and how she would be a better fit for my husband. She gave this woman my husband’s number, it was so crazy.  She has done other stuff and my husband didn’t see it until that and she started doing and saying stuff to him too.

I feel like now she realizes she is stuck with me, so she has not been that bad for awhile, but she always makes comments to me.  It is always to “help.”

It is actually very sad to me because he was very close with his parents and now is more guarded.  Not just for them not liking me, but for other things too.

I always try and make an effort with my MiL.  But some people aren’t going to like you.  You can’t control them you can only control yourself and how you handle the situations.  We still see my in laws a ton even though they are a flight away and I just have clear boundaries.  [/quote]

Ridiculous. I would not see someone "a ton" if they actively work to hurt my marriage. People like that don't deserve my love and attention. What game playing you are involved in.[/quote]

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