Reply to Should I try to become more of a sorority girl / PTA mom?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sorority girl and PTA mom are not the right terms here, but I don't know what would be more accurate. Something like "Stepford wives" or "mean girls" is too derogatory.

What do you call the woman who is very put-together, thin, shiny blown-out hair, confident, and feminine? Someone you look at and you know immediately she was popular in school. You can even see in upper elementary which girls are going to become these women (usually the moms and daughters both fit the mold).[/quote]

What I find more fascinating is that I can’t think of a single positive phrase to describe this type of woman. They’re all really derogatory and I think that says something. [/quote]

You know what- you're just a jerk. There are LOTS of "very put-together, thin, shiny blown-out hair, confident, and feminine" women who are kind, wonderful people. Why are you judging people based on how they look?

Surely we want our daughters and friends to be put together and confident? What's the opposite? A hot mess with insecurity issues is the opposite of those words.

(This is not me) some women just have an easier time of it than others. They're naturally put together, confident, popular and well liked. Such is life right? Worry about your own selves and stop judging other women. There are bigger things to work on without women constantly tearing each other down. [/quote]

I see how you got there, but that's not what I meant. I find it fascinating that they are all derogatory [i]because I think it speaks to a deep internalized misogyny.[/i] I'm 100% this woman - traditionally feminine, thin/fit, stylish, former sorority member, active in my kids' schools. And I'm fully aware that (1) certain women and men hate me on sight and (2) people will assume I'm an airhead. (I have a Top 3 MBA and a great career. I just really like beauty and fashion too.)

I think the more fascinating, and disturbing, take away is how happy many posters were to jump on the "sorority girl" and "Stepford wife" and put her down and tell OP how superior she is. I agree with your conclusion, "There are bigger things to work on without women constantly tearing each other down."[/quote]

I'm very similar to you. I'm attractive, confident, professionally successful. I was a sorority girl. Just like you said, so many women like OP do hate me on sight. The judgment from women never ceases. I prefer my male colleagues who have never commented on my looks, what I wear and are really only interested in how I run my division.

Women hating on other women truly is internalized misogyny.  I do hate the PTA though. I pay a TON in taxes and I don't believe in things like the PTA. Why should I fundraise for books for the library when I see the bloat at county school admin headquarters? And why should one school get more just because their kids are wealthier and the PTA there raises more? It should be equal. [/quote]

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