Reply to MIL has "gave" us a trip, we declined, she gave it to us again for christmas, we declined, she still will not stop

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Reply to "MIL has "gave" us a trip, we declined, she gave it to us again for christmas, we declined, she still will not stop"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here.

In laws live 15 mins from us. We see them 2x per week on average.

It is a timeshare "deal". They've had a timeshare for 25 years and go to the most random places. Not totally sure how it works, but it usually seems like they can't pick their dates either.

MiL is 64 and in good health so I don't suspect mental decline, but I guess it's not out of the realm of possibility.[/quote]

Can you ask your spouse to ask her why she's so set on this one place?[/quote]

It's because of how timeshares work. They don't get a refund so it’s only a good deal if they use their timeshare rights frequently.[/quote]
It sounds like she made the arrangements impulsively and now probably feels badly about it not working out. Since the relationship is a good one, and she’s usually reasonable, I’d definitely extend grace. I would have DH tell her how much you appreciate her generosity, but that in the future please ask about dates/locations because you don’t really have control over your schedules and you also have to consider how the kids travel. Let her know you love her and the gift of the good relationship is what you value. [/quote]

I would go further than that.  Make it clear your family vacations will revolve around what works best for your family.  If you are willing - say you would be ok with taking about a mutually beneficial trip.  But you need to stop this cycle of planning trips simply because they are in time share locations.  This is going to get worse as the kids get old enough for grandma to talk up a trip to them before she mentions it to the parents.  The MIL will be far more hurt if you have to argue / turn down trip after trip.  Better to explain your limitations now and that you or your husband need to be involved in any planning.[/quote]

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