Reply to Broken Marriage, Different Places on Where to Go

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Do the significant needs of your child mean that they will continue to need a high level of support and be living with parent(s) into adulthood? There is a difference between an arrangement that lasts for 12 more years vs. the rest of your lives.
Perhaps couples counseling, so the two of you have a space to try to really define what the arrangement will be.[/quote]

Yes, his support needs will continue throughout his life. It's unclear what will happen when we're not physically capable of caring for him. I hate to say it, but that will depend on how the silbing wants to do.[/quote]

OP, I think you and spouse need to focus on this. It's a huge stressor, and I think it might help to take some of this off your mental load. Please don't make the sibling take this on. You want them to be a sibling, not a resentful caretaker. Get with a financial planner and figure out savings, understand how disability benefits might or might not be a factor, learn about adult group homes, etc. I realize you don't have a crystal ball, and won't know exactly where your kid will be at in terms of need, you can front load a lot of prep and planning. With that done, you and spouse could THEN think more about how your relationship works for now and in the coming years.[/quote]

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