Reply to Sister gave up dating at 40

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You describe her in your initial post as successful, independent, but then later on describe her as attached by the hip to your parents with no life of her own. So that’s confusing.

I’m having trouble understanding how this concrete affects your life in a negative way. Attendance at a swim meet wouldn’t bother me.

How do your kids feel about her? [/quote]

They used to be enthusiastic about seeing her but now she’s a fixture to them they're so used to they say hi to and then disappear into their rooms to do homework or call friends.

She’s successful in that she has a lot of resources but our parents step in with her too much and she welcomes it. Sometimes, I see it like this—imagine someone who has plenty of job offers that would pay enough to afford a great apartment but opts to stay in mom and dad’s basement because it’s so cozy and mom and dad just adore the company. [/quote]

So you think they're all pathetic - not your problem.  They're far away and can be as co-dependent on each other as they want.  My uncle lived in my grandparents house for his entire life in a codependent relationship.  Was it sad thats the way his life turned out? Sure.  But it also ended up having a silver lining in the end when my grandma was infirm for 20 years after her husband died and my uncle spent 20 years taking her out to lunch, learning how to make her dinner instead of the other way around, taking her to doctors appointments, and being a companion.  It's not a life I would want and we all judged it, but in the end all appreciated that he was there in the end (that lasted 20 years!) as well[/quote]

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