Reply to Dealing w/aftermath of unfaithful husband and family

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You weren't wrong to tell them. You needed and deserve support.

They're upset with him and should be. As long as they are being civil who cares.

You want them to continue a fantasy  that everything is fine to make it easier for you to continue your fantasy.  .

The reality is he cheated and caused pain and they don't have to like his mand they can view him differently and that's part of his consequences.
It's not your job to save him from his consequences.

You're wasting energy on this so as not to deal with the husband problem.

And y dear you have a big husband problem.
You have chosen to stay but you say he isn't remorseful and doesn't care what people think.

Those are big red flags that he  will  leave you abruptly and not be kind about support.

So you need to protect yourself. Figure out how you can support yourself. Can your take some certifications online so your knowledge in your field is current? Can you squirrel away some money in a separate account?

Do you have a place you and the kids can stay?  I mean this seriously.op this man is not someone to blindly trust that he'll stay until the kids are out of the house.

Also suggest counseling for you. It's pointless for him as he sounds like a narcissist.
[/quote]

Yes to this!

Not your job to protect him from consequences of his own actions!

Take this time to put some money away, take concrete steps quickly to return to work or revive your career, get advice from a lawyer on where you would stand in a divorce, and build your support network. Hopefully you won't need this, but you have to be realistic. [/quote]

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