Reply to I can have a woman with a good career or good looks but not both

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yeah, well, marriage is a market. And clearly you only have a certain amount of "buying power."

My advice is this: bear in mind that looks fade. [/quote]

It can go either way though... if a woman isn't attractive in her 20s-30s things typically go downhill pretty quickly making the situation even worse whereas many attractive women try to maintain their looks[/quote]

Well, yeah -- but you can only "maintain" for so long and only to a certain extent. Even if you are great at maintaining your looks, they will go south to a certain extent at some point, and they matter a lot less 20 years into a relationship. Twenty years into a relationship financial/career success still matters (at least to the people it mattered to to begin with, and it apparently does matter to OP).

At any rate, looks and success are pretty much always the biggest factors that people consider (with most men putting looks first and most women putting finances/"success" first, but that can vary), but it truly is an all-facts-and-circumstances kind of thing with personality, family of origin, emotional stability, shared experiences/hobbies, life priorities, humor, etc playing a role as well.

I remember when I was in law school this guy who was about a 5 or 6 was talking about asking out one of our female peers who was about an 8, and as he walked away my friend shook his head and said "Some people just never get that there is a hierarchy." There is. OP shouldn't be this confused about that this late in life -- he isn't high enough in the hierarchy himself to attract women who score highly on both of those top factors: looks and success. The women who have both looks and financial success are probably going to expect both, or a great deal of one or the other. [/quote]

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