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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]op here and thanks for all the responses.  Really eye opening, especially the cultural part of it.

I have lived on the west coast and also the east coast, and I agree there is a vast difference in complaining culture.  And making a massive generalization here, but I felt that on the west coast, there was this laid back vibe that everything was groovy, all positive and love and light, and yet you could always sense this undercurrent of unhappiness/loneliness/shallowness. And on the east coast, you get a much more prickly and negative vibe on the surface, but in general there was a lot more substance underneath that, which had a more holistic acceptance of their unhappiness, but allowed for a much deeper connection with others.

Having come from a repressive household where I was not allowed a voice to complain, and then marrying someone who really loves to complain, almost treating it like a favorite past time, and comes from a family of complainers has been hard to reconcile at times. [/quote]

In defense of west coast positivity -- it's not fake. It is profoundly shaped by activist culture and self-help culture, both of which say that if something isn't good, you should act to change it. Either get angry and fix it, or find peace and accept it, but don't stew in negativity.

Also, outdoorsy people (who are not exclusive to the west, but prevalent there) have a culture of vocal appreciation for small things -- a great view, a favorite tree -- and of shrugging off disappointment, since you can't fight weather. All the most negative people I know are people who have zero exposure to outdoorsy culture.

That said, the tech boom has changed the west very rapidly and there are a lot of tensions between the culture of people who grew up there in actual "love and light" culture, and the fact you can't afford housing anymore: I'm not surprised you found unhappy people, as I moved away myself. But it's also very simplistic to pretend that happy people are shallow and negative people are deep.[/quote]

Oh shut up.[/quote]

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