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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My ex-husband fought for custody and won.  I was in a terrible place financially and newly unemployed when our divorce hearing was held- I think this was the deciding factor as the judge wrote that we were equally capable as parents (that and he hired the lawyer in the tiny jurisdiction we were in that wins all cases he’s involved in…but that’s another discussion).

It’s been the greatest heartbreak of my life, and I’m sure he fought for custody to hurt me.  I’ve worked as hard as I can to be a constant source of love and support to our children.  My ex-husband, by all appearances, hates the responsibility of fatherhood and is supremely neglectful: he expects the kids (who are only in elementary) to basically take care of all of their own needs, leaves them alone for long stretches, and drinks heavily/nurses hangovers around them pretty much every day.  He’s also extremely impatient and hypercritical of them. My kids have begged both of us to live with me; he ignores it and I tell them it’s not up to me.

Recently I said to him that I don’t even want child support (which is true), but that I just want the kids back.  He said that he was open to discussing this.  FWIW all of his animus toward me seems to have faded and we are on friendly enough terms.  He’s said he doesn’t want to have to go back to court and I agree (I’ve been through three lawyers; he’s still paying bills for his one).

How do I sweeten the deal so he just does it?[/quote]

Men are dicks during divorce.[/quote]

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