Reply to Why does my mom make it all about her?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

Wow interesting that so many are defending OP's mother.  I think people who aren't in these types of relationships with a parent don't get it.  It's the cumulative effect of a lifetime of command performances that are completely on the parent's terms and if the parent's terms are not met and they are not properly adored (which is a bottomless pit), there is anger and manipulation and attention-seeking tactics.

A normal parent would say...I'd love to see you and Billy and give him his book.  Is there a good time in the next couple of weeks?  If not, I'll pop the book in the mail to you and let me know when I can see you all next.

And then stop.  Wait.  Listen.  Respond to what comes next and don't bully your way into getting what you want.[/quote]

I think there are a lot of a board and difficult older ladies on her defending the mom's poor behavior.[/quote]

I think a lot of people lack self-awareness and think this kind of thing is normal and when they are young they get away with it more.  They're often matriarchs who dominate their family and have children who can't get away from them and don't know any better and a cowed spouse.  Then one day their children are adults and they are over it and hence the OP posts.[/quote]

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