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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You can't leave a person with dementia on their own, not even for a few weeks.  My neighbor ended up falling down the stairs at night and cracking her skull.  Wasn't found until the next day and that is with neighbors having to check on her as the kids thought she was okay to live alone.  This is after she got lost driving and kept locking herself out of the house, trying the wrong key in the door over and over. "Nope, she is okay."

Too bad doctors don't do any routine cognitive testing of seniors or make having a POA, etc a requirement to receive social security.  [/quote]
I understand what you’re saying, but if she won’t accept help I don’t know what I can do. I can’t stay here forever waiting her out. My presence is clearly of no comfort to her, and is in fact agitating her even more as I disrupt her privacy and routines. So far, she is able to take care of herself, and there are numerous neighbors and friends to help. Ironically, she locked herself out today when she slammed the screen door in a rage and the hook flew up and latched (see my earlier comment). There definitely needs to be better mental and cognitive screening for the elderly. She had her yearly wellness check a couple of months ago and supposedly passed the cursory cognitive check with flying colors.[/quote]
This happened with my mom—she’s always been paranoid, seemed depressed for decades, lost things, was combative if she forgets something, if she thinks we’re talking down to her, or if someone disagrees with her. She passed a basic cognitive test.

However, a year or so later, she got seriously lost driving, and somehow found her way back many hours later. After this crisis of sorts, she got a neurologist exam, got diagnosed with Alzheimers, and my dad had to go through a court process to become her guardian because there was no POA.

I’m afraid this might be how it has to happen with you and your mom. You'll need to wait for a crisis—hopefully one that does not involve involuntary manslaughter from driving with dementia—and then you’ll finally get a confirming diagnosis. After which you will can go through the court to become her guardian.

Hopefully you can get a second opinion before any catastrophic event happens. Her behavior could be because she’s not sleeping, or she’s almost OCD and is having trouble adjusting to this massive disruption of routine. These and other possibilities should be ruled out first.

So sorry you have to go through this. You do need to take care of your own health first.[/quote]
Thank you. She seems to be sleeping well, and is eating as usual. She has very rigid routines and is sticking to them. My presence and anything new that comes up seem to be what sets her off. I’m sicker today so am going to lay low. I’ve been trying to get through to Social Security for days, the hours long hold times and sudden disconnects will keep me busy for a while.[/quote]

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