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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I assume by boundaries or something else you mean "Are these normal and reasonable boundaries or is she just a piece of work who is being a controlling jerk? The answer to that is it doesn't matter. If someone doesn't want to spend as much time with you as you want, then you have to respect that.

I don't set boundaries with any of my friends because they already have healthy boundaries and I feel respected and enjoy their company. I feel the same way about some family members too. Others just drain the life out of me. Boundaries is usually the first step in trying to still have a connection to them. Eventually after years of trying to set boundaries and having them disrespected, you keep stepping back until you find a comfort zone. In some cases that means very low and superficial contact. [/quote]

If someone has started to "set boundaries" with you, that suggests there is a mismatch in terms of the relationship.  If boundaries can be respected, then the relationship can continue.  Maybe someone (like perhaps the sister) isn't great at clearly stating a boundary.  Maybe the sister doesn't want to say "I only want to spend one hour with you at a time" since OP would likely flip.  At any rate, the sister apparently doesn't feel comfortable with the relationship right now.  OP doesn't think the sister has a right to feel uncomfortable.  OP very clearly doesn't respect that sister is uncomfortable.[/quote]

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