Reply to Fussy, finicky people who can’t just go with the flow

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So irritating! I love my husband, but seriously, everything is always a production. We recently went to see a light show, and it was past dinner time, so I’m putting in a Chick-fil-A order for pickup on my phone (birthday kid’s request, and we knew this was their pick before we left the house). [b]“Wellllll, I don’t knowwwwww, I need to look at the menu.” [/b]It’s Chick-fil-A. You get a sandwich, nuggets or a salad, pretty much.[b] “Read me the mennnuuuuuu” and then proceeds to get a regular sandwich, like he always does.[/b]

His parents are the same way. I can’t just throw out an idea, every detail has to be picked over. [b]“Do you want to see a kids’ movie today? The girls want to go see ‘Migration.’”[/b] Well what’s it about, blah blah blah…it’s a kid movie. About ducks. “Well let me read about it, gee, I don’t know.” It is a kid movie. I’m paying. In or out. “Well what are the times.” Well, 11:30, 2, 3:40. “WELLLLLLL, I don’t KNOWWWWWW…” You have nothing else to do today. You are parked on my sofa. In or out.

I just can’t stand how some adults don’t get that not everything is a production, not every single meal is super important, not every single activity is super important, it’s about the big picture and the flow of the day. Just go along to get along, sometimes! In or out![/quote]

I am team OP, with a couple caveats. First, on the Chik Fil A, OP is 100% right. It is CFA, a fast food restaurant and the man knows he's going to get a sandwich. OP is clearly the one who is having to manage the majority of the decisionmaking and detail deciding here and was honoring the birthday child request, which the DH had to know. It is not a debate. OP does not have time to read the CFA menu to a grown man.

On the movie, OP is still correct in that the grandparents were being somewhat annoying - BUT, OP, the better way to manage would have been: "Wishy Washy Granny - the girls have asked to see the movie Migration. It is a children's movie about ducks. We are going to the 2pm show time. Would you like to join us?"

DO NOT give these people choices or an inkling that they can influence certain plans. Only allow them that leeway when it does not matter - like a flexible vacation day where the choices are should we beach, pool, walk, stay home and play games. Do not let wishy washies lead when timing matters, when there is a large group of people depending on the outcome - like, hemming and hawing at the beach over where to get dinner, so that by the time you get there at 7, there is an hour long wait, when the 5:30 window would have been perfect for a large family group to get in without a wait.

Clearly the wishy washies are out in full force on this thread and sure, great, be that picky over my medical care and titration of a medicine. DO not waste everyone's time on Tuesday because you want 2 full hours to consider where you might like to eat dinner. [/quote]

I am a pp with a similar husband that can’t make decisions. This is exactly the right way to do it. I tell him we are seeing a movie and ask if he wants to come. He doesn’t want to miss out so will make the decision quickly. If I give him choices, that is when he starts to get fussy. [/quote]

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