Reply to Anyone make it work (not just stay together) for the kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]	I think the poster who mentioned her darling parents nailed it, mine went through something similar and now that they are in their 70’s, they are so cute together. My husband and I also had a rough period which is now a distant memory. 
 
I’d suggest you and your husband sit down and do a deep dive into what you both want. Do you want more date nights? Do you need a different type of house/lifestyle? Do you want to attend religious services and if so what type? Are either or both of you too into a hobby or community activity so the other one is left feeling resentful? Do you want more sex? Does one of you travel and it’s taking a toll?

[b]Marriage counselors won’t help you until one of you has a physical affair or that is my experience at any rate.[b] You also need to take what you think and what you hope and apply reality. I lean more liberal in terms of religion, unfortunately, the liberal churches we attended seemed to have no use for our family. I can remember being at church talking about an upcoming activity and one of the organizers saying “You can come when your children are with their father” and I said “Their father.. he’s right across the room” the church catered to divorced families and we weren’t one of those. As much as I dislike some our current church’s stance on gay marriage, gay marriage is legal now so it’s not like the church can stop it. I’ve also found the church to be more of what I was looking for, stuff for the kids to do, a women’s group, a men’s group, and when I did need counseling the church was there something our previous church refused me because “You aren’t gay or divorcing”. I wasn’t, but that didn’t mean I didn’t need pastoral care, and had I gotten it, it’s doubtful the bad patch would have been so bad. 
I think too, you and your husband need to make it a point to be “extra sweet” to each other. That’s a term one of my kids uses and I like it, you apply real effort to be kind and loving to someone you love. 
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Declarations like this are so ridiculous. Marriage therapy has helped plenty of marriages that aren’t dealing with infidelity, mine included. [/quote]

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