Reply to Please help - Husband who only prioritizes job

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m sorry OP, i am in same boat. Welcome to the patriarchy and systemic imbalance. I have focused on making admin more efficient: i block all 3 kids doctors visits on same day to synchronize, regardless of actual birthdays; hire a weekly babysitter; block out times on my work outlook for family admin/ date planning/ vacation planning. I have found nagging ineffective and frustrating, so chose to spend time getting stuff done. I think the painful part is feeling like you are not a priority.  It does come back though. Children notice and punish an absent parent. That can be a wakeup call. They also know who to come to to rely on when they are older.  Good luck.[/quote]

+1.  You just described my life perfectly.  Except I wasted years and years trying to get things to change, and just ended up angry and resentful and doing it all myself anyway.    I've learned I can do a lot more around the house and yard than I ever thought, I ask my older sons to help with what I can't do myself (heavy lifting), and I feel great about myself in the process.  The resentment of the "absent" father figure and husband is still there, and you are spot on about children noticing.  All of mine do...they know he doesn't want to know, care to know, get involved, DO anything but his job.    And that takes a toll on their relationship, but it's not like I didn't warn him.  [/quote]

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