Reply to Blindsided by ER bill - DD says she was "roofied"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op, if you take the car over this, why would she ever tell you the truth about anything?  You’ve taught her that she needs to lie to avoid punishment.  [/quote]

For like the 10th time, she doesn't currently have a car. This is about her having a car next year. This is about her JUDGMENT. It's not about "punishment." Right now I'm seriously questioning whether it's a good idea to let her have a car. She's going to be living off campus a good 5 or 6 miles from school and the parties. If, in fact, this is something else other than roofies, I'm reticent to allow her to have a car if there's any chance she might show poor judgment with it and alcohol. No, I didn't think that would be the case until this incident.

I'd like to believe this is what she says it is. But she's really not behaving like a victim of crime. [b]Who downplays being violated like that?[/b] [/quote]

Lots of people. It’s a common early response, as if we can keep an event from being a big deal by simply acting like it’s not. I have no idea what happened, but please leave space for the possibility that beneath your daughter’s laughter she’s quite shaken, in which case this will come out in other ways — maybe not healthy ways — over time. Just be open.

I’m sorry you are dealing with this. [/quote]

DP, but I was roofied at a college bar a week before graduation. I didn't tell anyone - I was a goody-goody who didn't drank until I was 21, waiting for marriage to have sex, etc. I would have come off as a lying hypocrite. [/quote]

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