Reply to How to have a good Christmas for kids when we are in a lot of debt?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was raised to expect lots of gifts at Christmas.  There were never any financial issues in our family.  I also bought a lot of gifts for my children and they received lots from family during their early years when they were the first in their generation.  Once my kids reached late elementary school, we determined that, even if we could afford it, our values needed examining and we needed to cut back because we had started to buy gifts just to buy gifts, and unused gifts were piling up.  It had become a chore rather than a pleasure.

So when my children asked for things, I reminded them they already had something like it at home.  I also introduced the occasional used book or dvd as long as it looked new (usually purchased from library booksale or Ebay). As they became more digital, I shifted to buying video game cartridges the size of postage stamps and downloads which seemed less like things but gave hours of playtime and didn't clutter the house.  In that way, they were weaned off the experience that "Christmas means lots of packages".  It also helped that my husband and I typically mainly gave each other books and small cooking gadgets as presents over the years.  Eventually, we transitioned a lot of Christmas spending to ski lift tickets which were an experiential gift very much enjoyed by our children.

As the kids became even older, we stopped having gift giving birthdays and maintained only the "child gets a special dinner and requested homemade cake of their choice" tradition.  I rarely bake so the kids really appreciate mom's special effort once a year (we used to decorate the cakes fully with themed plastic figures, etc.)  When they were a little sad in a nostalgic way for the gift piles of yore, we discussed that although it is fun to unwrap things, there is no point in buying gifts that never get used or appreciated.  And they were logical enough to recognize they didn't ever want some of the well-meaning gifts they had received (science kits and other educational materials were big duds - physics comics books anyone?).

This may sound kind of joyless but my kids are happy and secure and way less materialistic than I was at their age.  They don't care about what kind of jeans they wear or what shoes they have.  They trust that mom and dad will provide for their needs and reasonable wants/moments of delight without them having to be obsessed with owning stuff.  I mention this to share my thought that you've gotten lots of good suggestions already and your kids will be just fine as long as you are comfortable with your decision and you genuinely reflect their interests within your budget.  I would suggest trying to get each the one present they really want and economizing on the rest.

When I think back to fun presents that were really enjoyed but cost less than $20, I remember t-shirts with silly sayings, a personalized mug, a novelty pillow in the shape of a loved food item, Pokemon card packets, stocking candy, a chocolate orange, and a wooden frog that made a funny croaking sound when you ran an included stick over its back.

I also do support holiday pajamas.  We bought them at Carters, once at Walmart, and Lands End on sale.  Never more than $20 (never bought for the grownups).  We let them wear them after Christmas and handed them down.  So they fit into the clothing budget more than the gift budget.  And I think my kids were a little sentimental about them.  Some got completely worn out because they were so cozy.

Regarding crafts...my kids liked making pony bead art keychains.  I got a starter kit at Walmart once that could have been shared by 3 kids for about $12.  Very worth it.

Happy holidays to you and all reading this thread![/quote]

I hate when materialistic people who spoiled their kids finally become self-aware and then try to teach everyone else! [/quote]

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