Reply to How cruel is parents not paying for oldest children's college, yet paying for the youngest?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We have just learned this will be happening in our extended family and feel so bad for two young adult elder kids. No dramatic change in household income or net worth. The two older children were told to pay their own way or don't go, while the baby of the family is getting hers paid for, a pricey private college at that.[/quote]

This happened with my BiL.  His parents paid for his younger sister and paid nothing for him.  They told him this flat out the fall of his senior year “we aren’t paying for your college but paying for sister.” They also paid for her new car, her wedding, and helped give her a down payment for a house.  They aren’t wealthy by ANY means.

My BiL got about a half ride scholarship to a state school (he could have got more if his parents had been upfront earlier) and worked all throughout college then he went to law school after working a few years and saving.  He is a lot more successful than his sister.  By leaps and bounds.  He is also kinder and more down to earth even with his success.  You would think his sister is a princess by how she acts and how she views herself sometimes.

He also has 529 for all 3 of his kids and will make sure they can go where they want for college.  He was very open about it and his dad finally told him they had faith in him being successful but not his sister (not a nice thing to say).  He believes it was favoritism which he says happened his entire childhood.

He has a better relationship with his parents now but it’s not great.  He didn’t even need/want them to pay for college but the blatant favoritism is what got him.

Honestly those parents don’t know what they have coming.  I have heard a few stories and people remember how you treat them and make them feel.

It’s one thing for a financial situation to have changed or something and sit the kids down and tell them.  You favor one kid and it will come back to bit you later. [/quote]

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